Some of the Worst Dudes who pose With Adult Film Stars - I’ll admit it. I’m as addicted to smut as most any male. Put it this way. I’ve already done my business and was caught by the woman once today. But you know something? I’m a normal guy.
I consider myself a reasonably handsome young man. And yet many times when I see pictures of your Aria Giovanni’s and Audrey Bitoni’s of the world, they’re always posing with some poor sap whose name is probably Rudolph, not Rudy, Rudolph.
I just don’t get it. But whether I get it or not, it’s fun to look at some of these guys.
Here are 10 saps wishing they had a chance with these women. [link]
Of course, I'm on there. While the author didn't really rag on me in her comment, I suppose I should be offended that I'm included in the "dork" category. But, eh, not really.
See, I don't mind being a "dork." Nobody's threatened by dorks. Dorks are never assholes or dicks, we're just goofy and different. Misunderstood, if you will.
But I think it says something when someone goes so far out of their way to make fun of dorks. You know, like, they're even lamer than the dork they're making fun of.
Whenever I see one of those Nigerian style email scams (you know, the ones that say "I own a billion dollars, but I need you to give me 10k, and you'll get $100 million finder's fee" or whatever), I wonder who in the hell falls for these. Heck, these have been around for so long, I wonder "Who in the hell still falls for these tricks?"
Now, I feel bad for this guy, but damn...
Paul Malone, a retired Vietnam War veteran, said he was leaving a convenience store when a man with an accent approached him and told him a story about donating money to charity.
"He was going to give me $10,000, and I would take the rest of the $80,000 and place it in a charity to help the poor," Malone said.
The man then asked Malone to prove he could be trusted by showing he had his own money, so Malone said they went to a nearby bank.
"All I could think about was, 'This money's going to help a lot of people,'" Malone said.
You don't really have to think hard to figure out what happened. Oh, sure, he didn't fall for the scam 100%... he went to the bank and withdrew some money just to show the guy... but then the guy ended up pulling out a knife and got the money anyway.
Congratulations to Michael Phelps... 8 gold medals in the Olympics is quite a feat, but to get 8 in one Olympics? Incredible.
Hey, he's fairly tall, right? I say we get him a Team USA basketball jersey and let him go for 9.
Speaking of the "Redeem Team," it's nice to see some of our overpaid yet still incredibly talented and athletic NBA pros go to some of the other events and cheer on our athletes from other sports.
Who saw the final for the men's 100m dash? Holy crap, Usain Bolt is amazing. I mean, when you're winning a short race (less than ten seconds), and you have time to celebrate and thump your chest even before you finish, and you get a world record? Yeah, you pretty much destroyed the field (2nd place was over two tenths of a second slower - which is an eternity in the short sprints). And he did it with one of his shoes untied.
And apparently, that's not even his best event (that would be the 200m).
But... Usain? Sounds like "Hussein." As in Saddam. Usain... Hussein... humm, are they brothers?
Anyone watching beach volleyball? I love the sport. (I still hate rally scoring, and always will. Bring back the Sideout game!) And beach volleyball is getting a lot of prime time air time, which is great for fans like me. Something that's not great? A lot of the yokels I've seen at various websites, commenting on beach volleyball, saying "that's not a sport." Are you kidding? Have you ever tried to play volleyball in the sand? Hell, have you even just tried to move quickly in deep sand? It's not easy, that's for sure.
Yeah, I know that lots of families go to the beach over the weekend and hit a ball around, because yeah, beach volleyball is fun. But to say something's NOT a sport because you think it's a recreational game instead of a highly competitive, intense game? What a bunch of cock. I mean, really, you could say the same about running. And swimming. Hey, I can go outside right now and run; why consider running a sport? Bottom line, these athletes are the best in the world at their sport, be it running, swimming, cycling, or beach volleyball. Just because you play the same game at home doesn't mean that it's easy, or that it shouldn't be in the Olympics.
Seriously, if you disparage beach volleyball as a sport, then you obviously know NOTHING about beach volleyball, and your knowledge of sports in general is also in question.
Oh. Oh! And I really love this - I've seen comments around saying that the women in beach volleyball are all a bunch of hussies, parading around in their skimpy bikinis. One person even called it "soft core porn." Are you fucking kidding me? First off, hello, it's BEACH volleyball. This is a sport that started on the beach, natch. Women wear bikinis on the beach. That's just how things are. And you know what? Surely, they're comfortable with it - when they practice (on the beach), they wear... bikinis. Surely, they don't have the body issues that a lot of people have. And, really, those "bikinis" are more like uniforms than skimpy bikinis. I mean, wha, you want them to wear long shirts and pants? Hello, sand everywhere. And hello, who in the fuck wears long pants and shirts to the beach? It's hot there.
My fave comment about women's beach volleyball:
"Women's beach volleyball is a poor excuse for men to watch women in skimpy bikinis perform subliminal sexual acts!
Why don't those women wear long shorts? Answer: If they did, nobody will be watching!
That's tells a lot about our society!"
No, it tells me a lot about YOU. Like, you probably molest children. And you have serious issues with women. Subliminal sexual acts? Yeah, if you consider passing, setting, and spiking "sexual." And if you do, then you're a fucking freak.
And... I'd still watch if they wore long shorts. Because I'm a volleyball fan. You fucking moron.
Don't put off by the title of the article (A Story That Will Make You, Well, Shit Yourself), just read it. And the comments. Hilarious.
I guess I really have nothing else to say. Except that I decided a name for my new Giant Domo. From now on, he will be known as "Mondo." I like the name because it's fairly catchy, and it's almost an anagram of Domo.
OK, one more thing, but only because I love the picture. This is Nils Olav, a Scot who was recently knighted by Norway. And yes, he's a penguin.
OK, who caught the men's 4x100 freestyle (swimming) finals last night? Anyone?
I was flipping around, and decided to watch the Olympics for a bit. And the race just happened to be coming up. While I'm not the best swimmer, I'm a fan of all (well, most) sports, and definitely a fan of some good competition. So I hunkered down to watch. Plus, there was the interesting side stories; France being favored and talking shit to the Americans, and Phelps and his quest for 8 gold medals (at the 8/8/08 games... how fitting).
What a freaking race. I was screaming at the TV. I think I may have stood up to cheer.
The final result (for the people who don't know/didn't catch it)...
Team Sweden - Congratulations! You just broke the world record in this event! But, um... you don't get a medal.
Team Italy - Congratulations! You not only broke the world record, but you beat Sweden. Too bad you don't get a medal, either.
Team Australia - Congratulations! You broke the world record by over a full second! For your troubles, you get a bronze medal.
Team France - Congratulations! You broke the world record by almost two seconds! Too bad it's only good enough for a silver.
Team USA - Holy shit, that was incredible. I didn't think he'd catch the Frenchman. No way. But he started closing in. And then they were even. They touched at about the same time, but who touched first? Team USA. By 8 hundredths of a second (another 8!). That's faster than the blink of an eye. Congratulations - you get the gold.
Being a numbers geek, I like days like this - you know, when just the date makes the day memorable. Like, I know that the first night game ever played at Wrigley field was on 8-8-88 (the game was rained out after a few innings, so the first official night game was the next day, August 9). Dates like this are great mnemonic devices.
Anyway, so the Olympics have started, and... well, I'm just not excited to see them. Yet. Surely, I'll get into it, but for now, I just want the Olympics to start so that all the speculation regarding the upcoming events can end. (but I'm looking forward to synchronized swimming. kinda. have you seen the Brazilians Bia and Branca Feres? hello!)
So let's talk about something else. Like, my new friend. Meet Giant Domo.
Now, Giant Domo needs a name. I want something that references his size (giant), but is still Domo-ized. So far, I'm considering "Mucho Domo" and "Domo Grande," but am definitely open to suggestions. Anyone out there want to take a crack at it?
And let's talk about So You Think You Can Dance. Congratulations on Josh taking home first place. Of the four that were left, I think he was the most deserving to win, although I was surprised that Katee didn't take second (for the record, the order of finish was 1-Josh, 2-Twitch, 3-Katee, 4-Courtney). Hopefully, the fact that a popper/street dancer won the show will encourage more untrained dancers to try out next year. Well, untrained, but good dancers. Hell, maybe it'll encourage Robert Muraine to actually follow through and NOT quit when the choreography gets tough. All in all, though, it was a great season.
Well, not "all" in all. There's something I've been meaning to bitch about since the beginning of the season, but always kept forgetting when it came time to blog - the camera angles/editing. Whoever is in charge of the camera angles and the editing needs to be shot. OK, maybe that's a bit harsh... fired, maybe. At the very least, he needs some lessons in angles and editing because a lot of times (and I mean A LOT), you couldn't get the effect of the dance because the angles were wrong. Or they were cutting between angles too quickly. Or... or... or... gah, that whole part of the production was shoddy. I don't know how many times we'd watch a group dance, and I'd think "Eh, this is OK. I'd probably enjoy it better if I could actually see what the hell was going on, though." Or, am I the only person who had a problem with this?
And another thing... who picks the music for the dances? Not that I mind the music that much, but damn, they sure featured a lot of Celine Dion songs. No, seriously! Like, at least one every show! Celine Dion! Who on the staff has such a hard-on for Celine Dion?
Aside from those two things, the show this season was just incredible.
And, speaking of incredible, what did you think of the Popping contest? Who do you think won? Chbeeb or Muraine?
First off, they're both incredible at what they do. No, not just incredible. Sick. Twisted. Insane. Ridiculous. But, for me, personally... I think Chbeeb won (barely). It's hard to choose, because the styles, while similar, are still very different. I think Chbeeb is a better dancer, but Muraine has the sicker tricks. Long story short - Phillip was more entertaining, while Robert was more... amazing. I hope they both come back next season so we can watch more of them.
If you missed it, or just want to see it again, here you go.
First off, I want to say thanks to everybody who wished me a Happy Birthday.
Most people on their birthday, they go out and cut loose. Buy frivolous things. I'm no different. For my birthday, I bought myself... more hibbies. Whoa, somebody stop me!
So, tonight is the finale of "So You Think You Can Dance." I can't wait to see who wins...
Will it be Katee, the girl who almost talked herself off the show? Or Twitch, a fan favorite who barely missed the cut last year? Or Courtney, the cute brunette who always seems to dance a little bit better than you thought she would? Or Joshua, the king of "I can't believe he's not classically trained"?
Personally, I think it's between Josh and Katee. Sure, Twitch and Courtney are fan faves, but Josh and Katee have both been dancing well and have been doing so all season. Of course, being a better dancer doesn't necessarily mean you'll get more votes (Hello, Will), so I guess we'll just have to wait and see...
But, also tonight... a dance off between Robert Muraine and Phillip Chbeeb. Don't know who they are? Well, they both tried out, both made it to the Vegas cuts, but Robert decided that the choreography wasn't right for him, and Phillip kinda just disappeared amongst the many who were cut that week. But... you have to see these guys perform. They are outright sick. Yeah, I know "sick" is an overused term, and I personally don't use it very often, but it's the best adjective to describe how these guys dance. It's sick. It's ridiculous.
Of course, I'm on there. While the author didn't really rag on me in her comment, I suppose I should be offended that I'm included in the "dork" category. But, eh, not really.
