OK, kids, got your thinking caps on? It's time for Match Game!
Your panel for today...
Keith - a transplanted East Coaster, a few years in L.A. have almost changed him into a California boy. All he needs now is to learn how to surf and skate.
Michele - she loves punk, she loves metal, she loves... American Idol? Yeah, I can't figure her out, either.
Maine - still the funniest guy I know. We're all waiting for him to get his own cable talk show.
Gen - she's a little cutie, but don't let her looks fool you. And, just a reminder, her website is NSFW.
Craig - microbiologist extraordinaire, trivia savant, and all around nice guy.
Ms. Q - don't say "irregardless" around this woman, or she might kill you. If I don't kill you first.
Enough with the pleasantries. Here are the questions:
- Bill is a nice guy, but he's not too bright. He invited the guys over for poker night, but instead of playing cards, all he had were _____ cards.
- Boy, singer Tom Jones is getting old. At his last concert, instead of throwing panties on stage, women were throwing _____.
- Frank said "Have you heard about that new seafood restaurant down on the corner? I don't want to say that they're unsanitary, but when I was there, the catch of the day was _____."
- Did you hear that Tom Cruise just opened a restaurant? As a promotion, the first hundred customers all receive a free _____.
- Jimmy is so old... (How old is he?) Well, he's so old, _____ was his science teacher.
Bonus: _____ trip
You know the routine. Post your answers in the comments, and I'll post the panel's answers below.
- Bill is a nice guy, but he's not too bright. He invited the guys over for poker night, but instead of playing cards, all he had were _____ cards.
Keith: product-registration
Michele: flash
Maine: greeting
Gen: Vegas Hooker Business cards
Craig: Tarot
Ms. Q: credit
- Boy, singer Tom Jones is getting old. At his last concert, instead of throwing panties on stage, women were throwing _____.
Keith: Medicare application forms
Michele: Depends
Maine: bloomers
Gen: Viagra and Depends
Craig: Depends
Ms. Q: Depends
- Frank said "Have you heard about that new seafood restaurant down on the corner? I don't want to say that they're unsanitary, but when I was there, the catch of the day was _____."
Keith: crabs
Michele: E Coli
Maine: salmonella
Gen: snapping pussy snapper
Craig: Cholera
Ms. Q: fire crotch
- Did you hear that Tom Cruise just opened a restaurant? As a promotion, the first hundred customers all receive a free _____.
Keith: copies of "Vanilla Sky"
Michele: anal probe
Maine: E-Meter
Gen: $cientology Bible
Craig: copy of Dianetics
Ms. Q: Imaginary Suri
- Jimmy is so old... (How old is he?) Well, he's so old, _____ was his science teacher.
Keith: Aristotle
Michele: Copernicus
Maine: Galileo
Gen: Einstein
Craig: Isaac Newton
Ms. Q: Sir Isaac Newton
Bonus: _____ trip
Keith: Guilt trip
Michele: Acid trip
Maine: A long, strange trip
Gen: Midget trip
Craig: Road trip
Ms. Q: Head trip
For the record, my answers were:
1. Magic the Gathering
2. up
3. salmonella
4. conversion to $cientology
5. Einstein
B. Road trip!
That's it for this week. Make sure to come back Friday for more hilarity! Or, at the very least, to come back to kill five minutes before the weekend.
« close it up
Posted by mikey at 07:29 AM.
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Match Game •
(19) Comments •
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1) Christmas
2) Depends
3) crabs - straight from Paris
4) e-meter reading
5) Copernicus
Bonus: acid
Posted by
Becki on 07/21 at 08:51 AM
1- IBM
2- support hose
3- Crab legs a la Cryptosporidium
4- "personality test"
5- Darwin
Bonus- bad
Posted by
Jen on 07/21 at 08:51 AM
1. Pokemon cards.
2. Brochures for term life insurance.
3. Scabies.
4. Brainwashing.
5. Darwin
Bonus: Vegas trip.
Posted by
Laura N on 07/21 at 08:53 AM
1. memory
2. ventillators
3. crabs
4. waste of time
5. Tom Jones
Bonus - Down Memory Lane
Posted by on 07/21 at 08:58 AM
1. credit
2. prescription savings vouchers
3. lice
4. copy of dianetics
5. darwin
bonus: road
Posted by on 07/21 at 09:43 AM
1) Old Maid
2) AARP hotel discount cards
3) sea slime
4) frontal lobotomy
5) Galileo Galilei
Whoa! what a trip!
Posted by
don on 07/21 at 10:13 AM
1. thank you cards
2. defibrillators (or viagra as my 2nd choice!)
3. sewer runoff
4. pack of vitamins
5. galileo
bonus: Road Trip!
Posted by
modigli on 07/21 at 01:34 PM
1. Greeting
2. Depends
3. Tire
4. SouthPark Chef doll
5. Newton
bonus: Road trip
Posted by on 07/21 at 04:39 PM
I am COMPLETELY not a California boy.
Posted by
Keith on 07/23 at 06:42 PM
Magic: The Gathering cards. That's hilarious.
Posted by
Craig on 07/24 at 08:25 AM
Magic: The Gathering cards!!! Nerd alert! Nerd alert!
Posted by
Trixie on 07/24 at 10:09 AM
