Hey Freak!

Good morning!

So, a few things I was gonna blog about yesterday, but I wanted to keep E-pak-sa at the top for at least one more day. Because, well... it's just about the best video I've ever seen. But, I digress...

• I signed up for Twitter yesterday. Yes, I know that I was a Twitter naysayer... really, I thought it was just another tool for the "I had a sandwich" blogging crowd. But then, I thought "You know, there have been about a billion times where I wanted to blog just one line... Twitter would have been perfect." But, for the record, I don't think I'm a sandwich blogger (at least I hope not). I prefer to think of myself in the comedy one-liner crowd. Because, sometimes, one line is all you need, and a full blog posting is just too much.
  
  For the record, I haven't had a sandwich in a long, long time.


• Speaking of food, have you been to Wendy's lately? Have you seen their new burger? It's called The Baconator. Two quarter lb. beef patties, two slices of American cheese, mayo, and six, count 'em, six slices of bacon. And if you super size your meal, you get a free cardiologist referral!
  
  (I made that last part up)


• Speaking of food you shouldn't eat... I love me some Cheetos. Love 'em. But only certain kinds...
  
  First off, they have to be the puffs. I'm sorry, but the crunchies just look like shriveled up versions of puffs. Maybe they're puff zombies; I don't know. But I don't like the crunchies. And, I know there are the "better for you" white cheddar Cheetos naturals, and they're awesome, but for now, I'll be talking about the old skool Cheetos. You know, the ones that turn your fingers orange.
  
  I don't like the other shapes. I don't like the X's and O's, or whatever other shapes they have up there. Why do they have to mess with shapes, anyway? Sure, to make 'em easier to market to kids, but really, what kid gets all excited to eat a big X? If you're gonna try to market like that, just say that they're snakes or rolling pins or something. X's and O's? Pshaw. Ooo, I can play tic tac toe with my Cheetos. How about this - make Cheetos numbers so at least you can be with the times and have people play sudoku with Cheetos?
  
  And I'm picky. Even some puffs aren't good enough. Really, it's a crapshoot when I buy Cheetos, because I only like the really really really light and puffy ones. Sometimes, I'll get some puffy but still kinda crunchy ones... and those are OK, but they're not the "good" kind. To me, anyway. Really, sometimes, a good, puffy Cheeto is just the best thing in the world.


• Speaking of old skool - does anyone else have an iPod with buttons? Really, I like to say that I'm "old skool," but really, I'm just too broke to go and get a new iPod. Plus, I may as well save up and just get an iPhone, right? Although... I've heard complaints about the service and such... well, maybe by the time I can afford one, all the kinks will be out, and it'll work as well as it does in the commercials. Which would be great, because you can get YouTube on there, which means you can also get... E-pak-sa!
  
  Brrrrrrrr - AHHHH!

Wow, I actually got a full circle out of that one. Happy Monday!

Dude. I've driven past Wendy's a few times in the last week, and every time I've said "What the hell is a Baconator?!" Thank you for explaining.

And your cheeto pickyness? I'm the same way, but with french fries. I rarely eat my entire serving of fries because most just don't live up to my standards.

I'm all about the crunchy ones. That Baconater sounds awesome, too.

Dude, I totally have a bag of those puffy cheetos sitting in my cupboard RIGHT NOW!! And when I bought them, I had a little internal conversation with myself as to whether I wanted the light and airy goodness of puffy ones, or the smaller, crunchier nature of the crunchy ones. Puffy won out.

To avoid orange Cheeto fingers, use chopsticks! My hubby and I grab chopsticks and eat Cheetos right out of the bag without worrying about turning our hands orange! And yes, puffy is the way to go!

Mikey, you can have my puffy and I'll take your crunchy... hmmm, is there any way I can say that with it not sounding so naughty???

Anyway, I went to the Wendy's site to see if the Baconator topped the caloric calorie count, but there's actually another menu item with almost 1000 calories: The Triple Everything with Cheese is 980 calories! The Baconator "only" has 830 calories.

On a side note, what do you think of this from the Wendy's site???
Special notice to inquiries originating from New York City:

We regret that Wendy's cannot provide product calorie information to residents or customers in New York City. The New York City Department of Health passed a regulation requiring restaurants that already provide calorie information to post product calories on their menu boards -- using the same type size as the product listing.

We fully support the intent of this regulation; however, since most of our food is made-to-order, there isn't enough room on our existing menu boards to comply with the regulation. We have for years provided complete nutritional information on posters inside the restaurant and on our website. To continue to provide caloric information to residents and customers of our New York City restaurants on our website and on our nutritional posters would subject us to this regulation. As a result, we will no longer provide caloric information to residents and customers of our New York City restaurants.

We regret this inconvenience. If you have questions about this regulation, please contact the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene and refer to Health Code Section 81.50.

Ok, I signed up for twitter because you did.

I have no idea what to do with it now.

I really don't get twitter. I signed up for it awhile back and since it shows up as one of my contacts in gmail now I'll occasionally send it a quick retarded update like, "I'm about to go pee". . .overall I happen to think it's pretty stupid. But, I can see you coming up with some interesting one liners. . .pee is about the extent of it for me though.

I am in complete agreement with you regarding the puffy versus crunchy Cheetos. I like to put them in my mouth and let them sort of melt, and suck the cheesy air right out of them.

Aside: I was munching on Cheetos the other day with the kids, and didn't realize I bought Shrek Cheetos until we all had green tongues, lips, and teeth. THAT could have been really funny in a work environment.

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